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Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Summer is gradually coming to an end. Is my writing?

I like summertime. It's a chance to swim in the pool on hot days. It's a chance to swim at the beach. Many plants flower during the summer. And I've had a good summer. My daughter, who moved to Georgia from Florida a year ago, has moved back. I had my three grandchildren around me for much of the summer. I painted in the hot garage almost everyday, my grandchildren right around me, also drawing, coloring, and painting. They produced many masterpieces, which are hanging on my garage walls. But it was hot in that garage. I came inside the air-conditioned house, sweat dripping off me, my shirt soaked. And I didn't mind it at all. The grandchildren are back in school now, so I have more free time. I'll be signing up for another drawing class, which starts next week.

The one thing I didn't do this summer was write. I wrote hardly a word of fiction. It was a thinking, reading, and wondering kind of summer. To be honest, the wondering has been about whether I'll continue trying to write fiction or give it up. My characters used to live inside my head; I temporarily became each character, feeling their feelings, thinking their thoughts; I became a different person for a while (actually, many different people), which is an amazing, emotionally satisfying kind of experience. That doesn't happen anymore. I don't become my characters. I'm not sure which is the mental illness: being able to become someone else, or not being able to become someone else. This is a serious issue. Not being able to become someone else leaves me with nothing to write about. I feel as if there's no life in what I'm writing. And, if there's no life in it, what's the point? This is what I'll be trying to figure out this fall, whether there's a reason to write anymore.

14 comments:

Misha Gerrick said...

Best of luck with finding the answers you need.

the weight of a letter said...

It's great that you have a passion for painting, as much as you have for writing. Maybe this summer you channeled your creativity through painting rather than writing? I'm sure you will write again, it seems that it is a big part of who you are, and it will come back to you.

Emily R. King said...

You'll discover what's right for you, Richard!

Nadine_Feldman said...

The great thing about writing is that if you want to come back to it, it will be there for you. Enjoy your life!

Julia Hones said...

Sweet post. Relax and enjoy the ride.
Try reading Borges for a change. His originality has the power to awaken something inside the mind... it is mysterious.
I'm glad you can paint with your grandchildren around. I should try doing it with my daughter.
Thanks for the link you left on my blog the other day.

Unknown said...

I truly hope you find your direction. I went through this the end of last year, Richard and even wrote an article about it on WOW (http://www.wow-womenonwriting.com/56-FE2-WritersIdentityCrisis.html). It was that big of a deal for me! It's a tough place to be in as a writer. I also firmly believe there are chapters in our lives and all part of the living process. All the very best to you.

Jon said...

I think this summer has been a wonderful haitus for you, during which you've had time to think, reflect, and work on your art.
I'm certain that with the coming of autumn you'll eventually start having new ideas for writing.
Summer is a lazy time for all of us.....

Tanya Reimer said...

Becoming your characters is exciting, rewarding, and frankly terrifying. But, when I don't feel that, I write non-fiction and just be myself, cause I'm kinda cool too. (not in the neat way they are, but, ya know.) :) Enjoy your break. Mine lasted nine years.

Donna K. Weaver said...

So you need a break. Even with regular days jobs we need a vacation. Enjoy the time away and see if your creatives juices start flowing again.

J.L. Campbell said...

You've laid of writing for a while. Maybe it was a time for your batteries to recharge. I suspect that when the time is right, the urge to write will creep back.

Lydia Kang said...

I hope you find the answer that suits you best. Sometimes writing just has to take a break from a person's life.

Kelley Lynn said...

There is NOTHING wrong with taking a break, no matter how long it lasts. And maybe, it lasts forever, and that's okay too. Like you said, what's the point if you're not enjoying it?

Lynda R Young as Elle Cardy said...

Sometimes an extended break will help with that kind of thing. Other times it's simply writing anyway and the 'soul' will eventually return. You have to find what works for you though. Best of luck, Richard.

KamilleE said...

I hope you find your way! Good luck! And there's nothing wrong with a break.

Your summer sounds like it was lovely by the way!

I hope you enjoyed the drawing class
:)