Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Painting: what it's teaching me about writing

Untitled (Oil pastel on paper) approx. 7.5 x 10.5 inches

I'll make no bones about it. I love drawing and painting. I'm loving it more and more everyday. I feel alive when I'm painting, more so than in most other activities. Even writing. But the desire to write is still within me, and what I'm re-discovering is that like painting--painting what excites and interests me--writing also needs to be based on what excites and interests me. Trying to write for the market just hasn't worked for me. I just cannot write to a formula, at least, not well. I need to return to the way I wrote maybe fifteen years ago, or earlier. Write what moves me and seems important to me, not necessarily what moves and is important to other people, which is most likely a prescription for not getting published. But, I want to be in love with writing again. I want to be passionate about it once again. Hopefully, I'm moving in that direction.

Untitled (Oil pastel on paper) approx. 7.5 x 10.5 inches

Friday, June 14, 2013

Herbivore, Mon Amour

I've chosen the title for my painting (help-me-name-my-painting). I like all the suggestions. Herbivore by itself didn't work for me, but with the add on it did; I like the rhyme and the "meaning". Thank you all for your suggestions. I think I'll seek your help in the future.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Help me name my painting.

I finished this the other day. I thought of calling it Self-Portrait as a Bug, but I don't have red eyes. I'd love to hear suggestions for a title from you. Please put your title in the comments.

Oil Pastel on paper, approx 7.5 x 10.5 inches.

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Every Sunset Is Also A Sunrise

I was reading Julia Hones' blog post this morning (Everness) when this thought occurred to me. I do not believe I've ever heard it before, although someone has probably already said it. "Every person's sunset is another person's sunrise." Maybe that's what Jorge Luis Borges is saying.

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Is It Time to Call it Quits?

Back in 2011 I wrote this blog post (read it if you wish) about losing my muse. Until I lost my muse, writing was so automatic, so real, the words and scenes and dialogue so vivid, that writing was really very easy for me. Then I lost my muse, and it's never returned. This loss happened just a month or two before I retired from the world of work. The loss of my muse was a terrible loss. Before very long it became apparent that it wasn't coming back, and it hasn't.

Despite that, writing was all I knew. It was still my dream, and I had (still have) much unfinished/unpolished material to work on. For the past three years I've been living off that surplus; yes, I've been living off the past. My short story collection The Gunman in Black was the first original fiction I'd written in three years. I've also written three more stories yet to be published. This appears to have been a temporary burst of creativity, because I've been unable to write anything new since February. In fact, I've been unable to write anything except a few blog posts and entries in my journal . As far as fiction goes, my mind seems to have become completely blank. I fear that my ability to write fiction has died.

The question has been floating around in my mind for a while now. Is it time to call it quits? The thought of trying to write a novel, to spend months and months, possible years, on it, struggling with every sentence, every scene, with all the complexities of creating a novel, seems an impossible task now. Lately, I haven't been able to even grasp the possibility of doing so. It just seems too difficult now. So, is it time to call it quits as a writer?

The desire to write still comes and goes. But it doesn't lead to action. So, I've been trying to accept the reality of my situation. Maybe it is time to call it quits.

Friday, June 7, 2013

A Portrait of the Artist as a Novice Artist

A few of my drawings and paintings.

Blind Contour Self-Portrait (pen and ink)

Wine Bottles and Mask (charcoal and conte)

Father and Child (soft pastels)
Street in France, or someplace in Europe (soft pastels)
Desert Moon (oil pastels)

The Studio (pastel and conte)

Mask (oil pastel)

Hope you enjoyed a few of my paintings and drawings.